What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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