What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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