What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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