What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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