What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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