What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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