What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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