What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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