What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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