What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
Canvas not available.

or


How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
Canvas not available.

or


Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
Canvas not available.

or


How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

Canvas not available.

or


Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
Canvas not available.

or


How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
Canvas not available.

or


My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

Canvas not available.

or


What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
Canvas not available.

or


What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
Canvas not available.

or


A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2025