What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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