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What did the painter say to the wall?
I got you covered.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They have machines to do that now.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?
He was board.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?
He took them to a pignic.
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What do you call two banana peels?
Slippers.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?
It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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Why was the piano player arrested?
Because he got into treble with the cops
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?
Because of the bark
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What is up in the air and wobbles?
A jellycopter
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