What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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