What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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