What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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