What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
Canvas not available.

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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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