What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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