What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
Canvas not available.

or


How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
Canvas not available.

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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
Canvas not available.

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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
Canvas not available.

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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
Canvas not available.

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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
Canvas not available.

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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
Canvas not available.

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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

Canvas not available.

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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
Canvas not available.

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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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