What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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