What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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