What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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