What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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