What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.

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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)

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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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