What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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