What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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