What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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