What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.

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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.

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