What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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