What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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