What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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