What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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