What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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