What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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