What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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