What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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