What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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