What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
Canvas not available.

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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
Canvas not available.

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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
Canvas not available.

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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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