What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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