What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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