What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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