What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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