What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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