What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?

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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon


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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!

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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.

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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.

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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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