What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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