What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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