What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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