What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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