What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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