What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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