What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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