What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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