What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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