What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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