What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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