What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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