What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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