What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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