What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?

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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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