What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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