What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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