What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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