What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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