What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.

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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.

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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs

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