What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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