What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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