What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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