What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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