What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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