What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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