What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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