What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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