What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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