What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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