What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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