What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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