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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?
No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?
To see time fly.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?
A cow walking backwards
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?
Sandy Claws.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?
A phew.
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What kind of potato chips fly?
Plane ones.
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What's a royal pardon?
It's what the queen says after she burps.
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