What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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