What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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