What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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