What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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