What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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