What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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