What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!

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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle

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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.

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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!

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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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