What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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