What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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