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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is happy when the case is closed
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?
The Elfabet.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?
She wanted to reach the high notes!
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?
It ran out of juice!
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What room does a ghost not need?
A living room!
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?
He felt funny.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?
"Would you like fries with that?"
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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