What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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