What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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