What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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