What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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