What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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