What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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