What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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