What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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