What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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