What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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