What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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