What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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