What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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