What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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