What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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