What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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