What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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