What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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