What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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