What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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