What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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