What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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