What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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