What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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