What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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