What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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