What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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