What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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