What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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