What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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