What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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