What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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