What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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