What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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