What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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