What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.

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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.

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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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