What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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