What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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