What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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