What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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