What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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