What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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