What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake

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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.

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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.

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