What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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