What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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