What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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