What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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