What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!


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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...

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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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