What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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