What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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