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What do envelopes say when you lick them?
Nothing, it shuts them up!
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Two satellites decided to get married.
The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What do you call an exploding monkey?
A baboom
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Why do cows go to New York?
To see the moosicals
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?
I'm outtie here!
Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?
Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?
She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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When did the fly fly?
When the spider spied her!
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