What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.

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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to

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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva


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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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