What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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