What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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