What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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