What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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