What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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