What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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