What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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