What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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