What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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