What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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