What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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