What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.

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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper

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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.

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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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