What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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