What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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