What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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