What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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