What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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