What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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