What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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