What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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