What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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