What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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