What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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