What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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