What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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