What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?

1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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