What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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