What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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