What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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