What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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