What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.

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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!

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