What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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