What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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