What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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