What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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