What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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