What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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