What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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