What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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