What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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