What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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