What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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