What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.

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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.

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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.

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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g

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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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