What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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