What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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