What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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