What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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