What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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