What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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