What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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