What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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