What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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