What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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