What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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