What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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