What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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