What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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