What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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