What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!

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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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