What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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