What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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