What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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