What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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