What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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