What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.

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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!

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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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