What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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