What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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