What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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