What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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