What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.

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