What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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