What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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