What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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