What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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