What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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