What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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