What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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