What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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