What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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