What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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