What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!

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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.

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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.

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