What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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