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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?
Sir.
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How are elephants and trees alike?
They both have trunks
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?
Plug its nose.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?
Sherlock Bones.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?
An Algae-bra
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?
A ruler.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
Fish and ships.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?
I'm going out tonight!
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