What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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