What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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