What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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