What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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