What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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