What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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