What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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