What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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