What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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