What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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