What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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