What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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