What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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