What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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