What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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